Why MySQL is not a queue

I tweeted something a few days ago about queues and MySQL. MySQL is not a data queue. MySQL is not a data queue. MySQL is not a data queue. MySQL is not a data queue. MySQL is not a data queue. — Kevin Schroeder (@kpschrade) October 23, 2016 … and I got a few confused looks, largely because you can use MySQL as a data queue (as in it is possible).  So here, now, I will explain why I said that MySQL is not a data queue, even though it can